A relationship not centered on sex??

[dldeviant]

Is it possible for a relationship to not be focused on sex? All relationships that I've seen or been in, have been about sex, ---, sex, and a little more ---. It just seems so unoriginal and kinda boring. Do you think it's possible to build a relationship around something else?

[alikakadri (deleted)]

this might be a long answer but it's my opinion. You bring up a very good point, BTW.

It's definitely possible, it just takes some basic connections/things in common and at least a decent basic friendship for it, but yes. Of course --- is always a part of a relationship, it just shouldn't be the main part because eventually, other things are going to come up, compatibility issues, financial issues, etc. If you've based it all on --- and find out that you have very different ideas on everything else, the relationship will go nowhere and was doomed before it began. Unless you have no plans on ever getting serious, well then by all means base it on whatever.


On a more social observation, i'm not at all surprised that that's what's going on. Most people think ----=love and will go with physical attraction until experience kicks in (if ever, lol) to teach that a relationship needs more of a foundation than ---- to work out. Then again I see ---- leading people by the nose, so to speak and then people stay in bad relationships and wonder why the other person lost interest or cheated or that sort of thing... because there was no love, no deep affection, nothing in common to begin with, just ---- and ---.

---- isn't love, it's just attraction.

In short, it's very possible, in fact it would be a stronger, healthier relationship than anything based on ---.

[rumtruffle]

`alikakadri is right.
----, being desired, can give a huge boost to your chemicals - many people confuse this inordinate feeling with love, and how love should be.

i've ben trying to figure out, what love is - a mixture of thankfullness and esteem, maybe?
but i know, that there is no "healthy" relationship with someone else, if you dont get along with yourself.
there are relationships that are based on mutual intellectual stimulation - platonic. that can be very intimate, but its a totally different thing to share your body.
naturally, we want to have sex, but a relationship based on that can merely be a relationship that provides for one need, even you you get along somewhat intellectually.

people can be vain on these things. libidinal. attraction does not make a relationship, though. rather a mutual appreciation of being with each other, which is not easy to find, i guess.
i always find it strange, that people try to get into relationships, always on the search.
forced unison.
still - i guess, i am searching myself, so...

my basic tip is just: don't make being in a relationship your number one priority - things will fall into place, with you just being. have sex, dont force feelings and look for someone to just be with easy.

sorry, if this was too much of a rant. :}

[awesomov]

`Wasn't possible in my last relationship thanks to my ex.

*Cough*

Sorry. Anyway, yes, it's possible, it just takes resolve. At the same time, it doesn't hurt to have it. I'm not the type of person who'd be interested in going out with a whorish person, but I'm not afraid of the practice, either. However, I'd prefer to fall in love first. Makes the whole idea more meaningful, and it feels better.

[silvercat17 (deleted)]

`It should be. --- feels nice, but there are a lot of things I'd rather do.

[fuggl]

`I couldn't be happy in a relationship that is ONLY based on ---. It can be a good part of it, sure, but I want someone to follow my interests with.. do some nerdy stuff together

I guess if you're fine with doing most things on your own or with friends and just want a partner for the basic needs and support, that could work out. Nothing for me though.